“Metal” Wednesday- -Pantera (not metal)

I promised content during Miss Theberge’s hiatus, so here’s a lyrical dissection of the song, “Walk” by Pantera. Here’s a hint– she doesn’t think they are metal.


Walk by Pantera
Can’t you see I’m easily bothered by persistence
(Am I bothering you, wait what’s your name? This is the first I’ve heard of it. Tell me how you feel.)
One step from lashing out at you
(It seems like you’re already lashing out at me.)
You want in to get under my skin
(It’s working isn’t it?)
And call yourself a friend
I’ve got more friends like you
What do I do?
(Wait. You don’t like me, but you have tons of friends like me? Maybe the problem is you. Ever think about that? )

Is there no standard anymore?
(I feel as though you’re singing this about yourself, Unironically.)
What it takes, who I am, where I’ve been
(… what? Random. That had no relation to the previous lyrics)
(Belong? To what? A cult of Pantera fans? )
You can’t be something you’re not
(This I agree with. However, you’ve been insisting on being something you’re not. Hell, I knew a guy who was your biggest fan, and he pretended to be nice, and sweet, but he turned out to be a cheater, who uses people for money. Then he blocks people because he’s a big ol chicken. *Tommy Wiseau voice* Janko you just a cheeekan cheep cheep cheep! Did you know you had fans like that, John? It’s embarrassing. It’s why not many people like you.)
Be yourself, by yourself
Stay away from me
(Aww, watcha gonna do, Bill? Get mad and write a song? I’m sure some fan of yours has this raging in their heads right now.)
A lesson learned in life
Known from the dawn of time
(What’s the lesson? Stay away from you, or be yourself?)

Respect, walk
(I respect walking, yes. A lot of people take walking for granted.)

Run your mouth when I’m not around
(I’ll run my mouth when you’re around, bitch. I’m not afraid of you or your fans, Neil.)
It’s easy to achieve
(What’s easy to achieve? Running my mouth when you’re not around? Wouldn’t it have been easier to say, “it’s easy to do?” Then again, Gill, whatever your name is, I don’t expect intellect from you.)
You cry to weak friends that sympathize
(I’m sure in my regards, he’s crying to all of his hometown about the big mean lady who is just so mean and makes him sad. He’s the victim here, I’m sure. I mean, this bitch American just won’t shut up about him. You’d think he did something awful. . Oh wait… Sorry, went off on a tangent. What was that, Paul?)

Can you hear the violins playing your song?
(You mean the world’s smallest violin playing my heart bleeds for you? Or do you mean violins are playing Muzettas waltz for me? That would be the tits. I don’t expect you or your fans to know Muzettas Waltz or the opera it’s from, Sam.)
Those same friends tell me your every word
(I thought you didn’t care. Actually, if your friends are being two faced, one day they’ll do it to you too. Kind of like that whole, “once a cheater/liar, always a cheater/liar–Right, Alvin?)

Is there no standard anymore?
(I really should emphasize that if you are surrounded by shit heads, maybe the problem is you, Tyrone)
What it takes, who I am, where I’ve been
(Yeah, Yeah. We get it. You’re a big bad metal head, Jim)
(PUMPKIN!… I can put random words in too, Dennis)
You can’t be something you’re not
(Actually you can. Ever hear of otherkin? )
Be yourself, by yourself
(Better than being friends with a cranky shit who whines all the time. Is there a song of yours where you aren’t whining about something? )
Stay away from me
(Plan on it. Waaa waaa waaa waaa)
A lesson learned in life
Known from the dawn of time
(There you have it folks. From the dawn of humanity, humans have learned to be themselves by themselves and stay away from Paxton)

Respect, walk
(I do respect walking. Its hard if you can’t walk)

Are you talking to me?
(No. I didn’t say anything. Are you hearing voices again, Perry?)
No way punk
(You are hearing voices. Must be all the acid you dropped in the 80s)
Walk on home boy
(PHIL! That’s your name. I had to look it up. Why don’t you do something constructive and walk on home. You’re like the Black Veil Brides before Andy learned how to write a song! All I hear is, “*whine complain I’m so mad! People suck so much!* wow.)

Dearest readers, it seems most of Panteras music, and lyrics are about whining, how much people suck, how someone made them mad, how life is hard or it sucks. .. are we sure Pantera is metal? They fit the genre of emo nonsense fairly well. However one of my favorite bands is an emo band, and honestly while they aren’t everyone’s cup of tea, when you compare the songs, the messages are the exact same.
Pantera is an emo band.
With emo fans.

In that case, you’d think I might like them.


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